Social Anxiety in the trouser department
It’s a high pressure world we live in. The fast paced like-and-share generation many of us seem to have become absorbed in impacts on daily behaviour and personal mental stress for many people. If it’s not on Instagram, Strava and Facebook then it didn’t happen. If it doesn’t get liked, it’s not worthy. If you didn’t get a KOM it was terrible. None of that’s true, but there’s a part of all of us that loves recognition and appreciation and it’s hard to keep pushing back on simply having a good time for a good times sake, without documenting it for nobody to actually care about.
I struggle too. As much as I push back from personal social media, occasional forays then feel like the subtle #humblebrag. So I’ve come to enjoy more the documentation of our local CoOp noticeboard (Cat Reiki anyone?) rather than pushing for perfectly instagrammed food (because I’d rather eat it.)
That doesn’t mean I’m not without my social anxieties. From the most anxious “…after what happened last time” comments that confuse and worry, to the ultimate. Something that has scarred me since the lunch queue at school, holding my purple dinner dinner ticket and hoping it was swede and roast potatoes.
Missing a belt loop with my belt.
It’s irrational, and it’s daft. But anxieties don’t have to be critical. They just niggle. It stems from someone in the queue behind me ruthlessly ribbing me because I’d done it on my school trousers. And it lodged in my brain. Hard.
So I check and recheck and count and inspect. Once it’s on it’s on, and I’m not in the habit of swapping belts around frequently, so that’s all fine. But that’s bad too…
I’ve just had a belt incident. On a Friday morning. On the shorts I’ve been wearing for a week. I’ve not taken my belt off, which means that for a week I’ve been walking and riding about with this belt-loop-error. And it feels awful. But it really isn’t.
I’m going to beat it. My shorts are on again today, without this error corrected. They stay up because they fit me, our belts are solid. It’s all good.